


The Importance

by vehlr



Category: Batman (Comics), Booster Gold (Comics), DCU (Comics)
Genre: Grief/Mourning, M/M, Self-Esteem Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-11
Updated: 2014-10-11
Packaged: 2018-02-20 18:56:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2439242
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vehlr/pseuds/vehlr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Some people just... matter.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Importance

At first, he hangs around because Bruce understands – Bruce knows how it feels to be haunted, to walk with a ghost and to feel their presence in every breath. And to unburden himself, even if for only a moment, feels liberating. Bruce listens without judgement, understands without words – and it helps that Alfred always knows just what flavour of tea to provide for him.

And more and more, they talk of other things – not quite small talk, not in their line of work, but something a little less revealing and a lot more like friendly exchanges.

He is not sure when he starts to look forward to these evenings, but it feels oddly… wrong. Like a betrayal of sorts, though he is not exactly sure who he is betraying.

He stops going.

***

Three years on from Ted’s death, and Booster finds himself sat in front of his best friend’s grave. He is not here, not anymore – the Lanterns saw to that – but it is still comforting, in a way. He knows the rest of the old team will be here soon, but he wanted to be early, to steal a precious few moments…

“You loved him.”

He all but jumps out of his skin as Bruce stoops to leave a single rose for the Blue Beetle. “What are you -”

“It’s alright. Everyone knew, especially Ted.”

“I’m not -”

“Does it matter?” He turns to regard Booster, and the man tilts his head to look up at the Bat.

“I… I don’t know. Does it?”

“Not to the people who matter. Never bothered him, and it doesn’t bother them.” He gestures beyond, the small group of costumed heroes just visible as they make their way through the graveyard.

“And you?”

He shrugs. “I don’t matter,” he states simply, before taking his leave.

This bothers Booster immensely.

***

He has snuck into the Batcave plenty of times before, but never like this – the lights are on and someone is certainly home. He knows Bruce will have noted his arrival, so he makes no grand secret of his entrance.

“You’re wrong, you know.”

The Batman looks a lot less formidable without the cowl, but no more approachable as he turns in his chair to face Booster. “Rarely. What about?”

“You. You _do_ matter. A lot, actually – where the hell do you even get off saying that?” He is angry now. He had thought about it for a while, and decided somewhere between Bea’s suggestion for a drink and Guy’s refusal to pay for a taxi home that he was actually really angry at Bruce for suggesting such a ridiculous thing. Of course he mattered!

“Not an unreasonable assumption, given how infrequently we’ve spoken,” he points out, and Booster stops. “Out of curiosity, why did you stop coming over?”

“I… I don’t really…”

“I didn’t take it personally,” he adds.

“How do you do that?” Booster demands finally, leaning against the railing and shaking his head. “You’re so… detached from everyone else. How can you do that and still affect us the way that you do?”

“Affect you?”

“I stopped… because I felt like I was… like it was too soon to say goodbye to Ted as… as my best friend.” The admission burns him. “You were exactly the person I needed you to be, and I thought that it was… oh, I don’t know. I didn’t see it at the time, and now I’m here and I feel like a moron.”

“Michael -”

“That! That right there!” He points at the man. “The way you say my name! Nobody says it like that – like they get it, they get me. But you… you get me. And it’s…” Bruce stands, finally, and Booster stops him with another gesture, hands out. “No, it’s like… you understand me like _he_ did. But in a way that… I don’t know, I don’t know!”

“I’m not Ted,” he says softly. “I’m not replacing Ted.”

“I… I know that.” Booster pulls his goggles off, rubbing at his forehead. “You’re quieter. Slower to anger. Not as smart.” His voice drops low. “Here.”

“Michael -”

“I’m not expecting you to be like him, okay? I just… I don’t know how to feel right now. Ted would know, and I can’t ask him, and -”

Bruce stops him with a soft hand on his shoulder. “Michael, stop. I know exactly what Ted would say.”

“You do?”

“He would tell you that he loved you, but that you’re being a child and he’s not willing to be arrested for spanking you for your behaviour.”

Booster blinks, before smiling gently. “He was a jerk,” he murmurs, before pulling Bruce into a tight hug. “And I don’t care if you don’t hug,” he adds, voice muffled against his shoulder, “but my sister isn’t here right now and you are.” The man hesitates for a moment before putting his arms around Booster, gentle.

“What you’re feeling is natural, but Ted wouldn’t want you to lose yourself to it. And neither do I.”

“Really? Because from where I’m standing, I’m quite the pain in the ass…”

“Michael.” Bruce pulls away to look him in the eyes. “Stop.”

Booster tilts his head slightly. “Wow. You really mean that, don’t you?”

“Of course.”

“I, ah… I haven’t really mattered to anyone in a long time.” He smiles. “Comes with the identity. Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me for understanding your value, Michael.”

“That’s not why I’m - nevermind, look. You’re not…” Booster swallows, his arms coming back up to keep Bruce close. “You’re not Ted. But I… I’m not that guy anymore either.”

“No, you’re… you’re not.”

“And I’m not -”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“No, I mean -”

“Michael -”

“Bruce, I’m not _over him_. That’s what I’m… look, I’m always going to – to love him. But -”

“I know.”

“Could you let me finish just one sentence?” huffs Booster, and Bruce – surprisingly – smiles.

“No.”

And the kiss, though unexpected, stops any more sentences dead in their tracks.


End file.
